Psychotherapist Esther Perel explains the psychological aftermath of breakups and founder separations to host Shane Parrish.
0:00 / 0:27exact quote · 27.8s
720p mp4 · rendered on demand · StarZero watermark
“The way people leave the previous relationships, the quality of the breakups, is really at the heart of how people start the next relationships. How much they will trust, how they trust, how they collaborate, how they protect themselves, how they anticipate, you know, what had happened, how much they bring these invisible Others, exes, with them, be they ex-partners, husbands, wives, or boyfriends, or founders, you know.”
quote is from the automated transcript, cleaned for reading:
filler sounds and stutters are removed, nothing is rephrased. names can be misheard
(the analysis reads context, assessments check outside sources). how →
More from Esther Perel
Insight
Perel: Marriage was historically an economic enterprise separate from passion
“We've never looked for, you know, the word passionate marriage is a contradiction in terms. We've never looked for passion in the same place where we looked for security and anchoring and somebody with whom to pay the checks and fix the house. These two things…”
Perel: Core 20-year relationship conflicts are present on first two dates
“There is a theory that says that basically, whatever you discuss, the difficult conversations, if you want, that you discuss 20 years later, they were all there in the first two dates. People actually know their things. They know their key conversations from t…”
Esther PerelJun 21, 2022▶ 12:59TKP Insights: Sex and Relationships
Insight
Perel: Believing you can create stability is a fiction
“To imagine that you can create stability is basically a fiction.”
Perel: Changing personal narratives physically alters body language and movement
“It's that the story that is linked to emotions, and emotions are embodied experiences, so when people tell you a story a certain way, they also sit in a certain way that, that leads to telling that kind of story. If you change the story, the body will move dif…”
Perel: Decades-long relationship conflicts are visible on the first two dates
“You know, there is a theory that says that basically, whatever you discuss, the difficult conversations, if you want, that you discuss 20 years later, they were all there in the first two dates. People actually know their things, they know their key conversati…”
This entire site, over 200 episodes transcribed, diarized, checked and made playable,
runs on the StarZero media pipeline. Drop in your own episode and the podcast clipper finds the
moments worth sharing, cuts them, captions them, and reframes them for every feed.
We use essential cookies to make the site work. With your permission we
also use analytics cookies (Google Analytics and Mixpanel) to understand
usage and improve StarZero. See our Cookie Policy.