Everything Bob Sutton said on any show that made the record, most notable first. Each card names its show and opens the statement there.
Sutton: Emotional intelligence is only 10% as important as IQ
“EQ is one of the most overrated concepts on the planet. It's there, it matters, but if you look at the evidence, it's about, a good guess, 10% as important as old-fashioned IQ.”
Sutton: High emotional intelligence enables malicious manipulation of others
“People with high EQ are especially good at manipulating others to ill means. So it exists, but it's a concept that has been way over glorified.”
Sutton: Proximity to a toxic coworker dramatically increases job loss risk
“What this research shows is if you're within 25 feet of a toxic person, so what I would call an asshole, the chances you're gonna become toxic and lose your job go way up.”
Sutton: Effective toxic leaders rely on dedicated workplace toxic handlers
“If you were going to be an effective asshole, Get yourself a toxic handler. To calm people, people down to clean up the mess, to tell them that it really wasn't that bad.”
Sutton: Power without respect turns individuals into vindictive jerks
“In general with human beings, if you put them in a position where they have some power over people, but they don't have prestige, they're not esteemed. And it turns out that having power without having stature or respect. So you think of somebody at the DMV wh…”
Sutton: Baird CEO Paul Purcell enforced an explicit no asshole policy
“Paul Purcell, he was CEO for years, W.R. Baird, now called Baird Financial Services Firm. They have a no asshole role. He tells people during the interview, if I find out you're an asshole, I'm going to fire you”
Sutton: An asshole leaves others demeaned, de-energized, or disrespected
“The way I define an asshole is from the receiver's standpoint, somebody who leaves you feeling demeaned, de-energized, disrespected.”
Sutton: Be slow to label others as assholes, quick to judge yourself
“If you look at all the biases we have as human beings, it's probably best to be slow to label other people as assholes and to be fast to label ourselves.”
Sutton: Unpleasant colleagues often just have a bad user interface
“There are certain people who just, they just have a bad UI. And once you get to know them are actually great.”
Sutton: Manage toxicity by exiting, defending yourself, or fighting back
“There's three basic kinds of strategies. There's you get out. The other one is you reduce the damage you suffer, which is either by kind of getting away from the toxins or not having them bother you so much. And then the last one is changing the, your situatio…”
Sutton: Humans lack self-awareness and cannot judge their own toxic behavior
“The evidence about self-awareness is we just suck, and the worst person to ask if they're an asshole”
Sutton: Self-awareness requires external peer feedback, not internal reflection
“In terms of self-awareness, the researchers who studied this essentially say, don't look in the mirror. Find somebody you know and trust and ask them, what do you think?”
Sutton: Effective relationships embrace intense conflict motivated by shared interest
“I believe that the most effective human relationships are frank and actually can get conflict that to outsiders can look pretty ugly, but the difference is that when it's done in the context of, I'm doing this in our collective or your best interest, even thou…”
Sutton: Getting a hostile person to do a favor reduces their dislike
“There's very good evidence that if somebody does a favor for you, it's really hard for them to dislike you because of the two dissonant elements, which is, I don't like this person, but I'm doing a favor for him or her.”
Sutton: Office communication drops sharply beyond 60 feet of physical distance
“Essentially once you got more than 60 feet away from someone, and this was in a closed office environment, you might as well be in another country.”
Sutton: Lack of eye contact reduces empathy and increases hostility
“When we have communication, even with people aren't strangers who, when we don't have eye contact, we tend to be less empathetic and more nasty.”