Manson: Blaming an ex on a first date is a major red flag
Mark Manson · The Confidence Expert: How To Build UNSHAKEABLE Self Confidence | Mark Manson · Dec 4, 2025 · at 1:09:40
Author Mark Manson shares his go-to first-date vetting question to evaluate accountability and emotional maturity.
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“My favorite first date question that I recommend everybody ask is, ask the person you're on a date with what did you learn from your last relationship? And the red flag is if the person starts going off about how horrible their ex was, and how shitty they were, and oh my god, I can't believe I dated them for so long. Like, that, that person, run far away. Get as far away as you can. What you're looking for is somebody who says, you know, it was a complicated relationship, it was good for a while, then things went bad, here's why they went bad, here's, here was my part in it, this was their part in it. Somebody who has perspective and an understanding of, like, what went wrong and who also has clearly, like, done some work since then to make sure that it doesn't go wrong again.”
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