The Exchanges

Q wondering if they should, you know, after college do their own thing or get a full time job. And they're going, this guy was like, if he was really thinking that right out of trauma like this, he was incredibly empathetic and self mature. Was there something in your childhood that had already put that kind of kind of viewpoint in your brain or how, how did you have that?

A Two things. Number one, my sister died when I was eight years old and she was 18 months old. So she was a baby and she died in my mother's arms when my mom and I were at home. And, um, the, uh, my, within a matter of months, you know, my, my parents losing their, their baby. I mean, hardest thing as a father now, I can't even imagine. And, uh, within a matter of months, my mother formed a support group for other parents that had lost children. And she led that. And so I, I learned at a very young age that you can take your own adversity and you can turn it into an advantage by finding a way to make it benefit other people. And that, that's what I did right after my car accident. And the second thing I learned in my sales training a year and a half prior, I learned the five minute rule, which is it's okay to be negative when things go wrong, but not for more than five minutes. And my manager, my mentor literally taught me to set your time for five minutes. If you have a no sale or a canceled order or You know, anything that causes you to feel disappointed or upset five minutes, you get five minutes to be pissed off, sad, cry, whatever. And when the five minute timer goes off, you take a deep breath and you say, okay, I can't change it. I'm not going to be upset about it anymore. I'm going to move on. And I conditioned myself to think that way with that five minute rule for a yea…

AI assessment note: “Two things. Number one, my sister died when I was eight years old”

Q the second one, I'm going to just pull this one out for the sake of time. You told me that in your book, you tell people just do simple things in the morning, like brush your teeth, right? Is that an example of what you mean when you say, just give something people easy to do, or they think about your book and it's very easy to do every morning.

A Yeah. Well, my buddy, Pat Flynn, who wrote the book, will it fly great business book? He, uh, we, the other day we were talking and he said, you've got to give them a quick win. He said, give them a quick win in the 1:05 minutes of reading his book. And I actually don't know what the win is. Um, but, but I, he, he sets them up with a quick win. So for, for free, I think that's really important that you, you don't, don't make like the more difficult you make it for people to implement your content, the less likely they are to implement it. So if you can make it a quick win, Uh, that's a big, I think that is overall a win for you. It's a win for them. And then they have confidence, they have momentum, and then you scale up how difficult, you know, whatever it is that they're trying to integrate into their, their life or any changes they're trying to make.

AI assessment note: “Yeah. Well, my buddy, Pat Flynn... you've got to give them a quick win.”

Q right? And that Experience, you know, taught you some things that you might tie to your success. Do people listening right now have no hope if they have not gone through a traumatic experience like that, that helps them kind of a, whatever lessons were, appreciate life, be more risky, whatever it was. Do they have to go through those traumatic events to have the kind of success you've had?

A No, I think that some people go through that and then hopefully those people, uh, take the lessons that they learn and share it with other people. And that's what I always say when I You know, when I was giving speeches to college students or high school students, 15 years ago, I was like, just so you know, you don't have to go through this to get the lessons. The lessons are what are powerful. And, uh, hopefully you don't have to go through it. And, you know, but I think that, uh, it's kind of like, do you have to have a business, you know, Fail or go bankrupt to learn. No, no, no. You read the books by the guys who did that. Right. And then you just, you just, you, you learn from their mistakes. Don't make the same mistakes. Learn from the actions that they took, take those actions and you can get the same results without going through the hardships.

AI assessment note: “No, I think that some people go through that and then hopefully those people”

Q So before we talk about revenue and more metric specific stuff, what's the number one lesson you took from that experience?

A Accept all things that you cannot change while you focus on what you can. And that was it. And The doctors thought I was in denial because I was so happy and positive and loud. And this was when I was told I would never walk again. I was laying in the hospital bed, broken bones, and I was just really grateful, really happy. And the doctors thought it was delusional. And, uh, and what they didn't realize, I said, no, no, I've just, I've accepted. I can't change that. I was in this horrific car accident, but I can choose to be the happiest, most grateful I've ever been in my entire life. And, you know, to me, this is a catalyst for me to, to try that kind of a test, if you will.

AI assessment note: “Accept all things that you cannot change while you focus on what you can.”

Q The miracle morning, best, many people say bestselling self-help book of all time. Uh, my question to you is why?

A Um, because it changes behavior. I think that if you, you know, if you think about most books that we read, if we read a good book while we're reading that book, we're like, Oh my, it's like, it's changing our thinking typically. Right. And because our, our memories are very short, we have so much stimuli, uh, you know, today with, you know, our focus is all over the place. And, and so while you're reading a great book, you know, you might be telling everybody, you know, oh my gosh, this book's amazing. You got to read this. But as soon as you're done reading that book, you, you start to forget the lessons and the things that were getting you all excited. And then if you start reading another book, now that's the best book you ever read. And you don't talk about the first book. However, if that first book changed your daily behavior, where you now do something different every single day that adds significant value to your life. Well, the, the, the talking about that book, Is going to extend beyond the book itself for as long as you do the behavior. And we have people that the miracle morning is not only changed their life, you know, quickly in the short term, but they, it continues to do that years after they read the book and people are still asking, Hey, what's this thing you're doing? Why do you wake up early? Well, you know, what's going on. And that to me, I think is the s…

AI assessment note: “because it changes behavior.”

Q the book because many authors will tell me, Nathan, my book is so great because it changed habits, but very few actually do, right? You actually did things structurally. Give us one or two tips for people right now that are thinking about writing a book where they actually want their book to change habits and behavior. What are some structural things you did tactically to make those habits stick?

A So yeah, the first thing is, is the behavior change, right? Is that you've got to take whatever you're teaching and ask yourself, how can I take this and put it into a daily, ideally daily, it could be weekly, but you know, ideally the more often they're doing it, the better, the more likely they are to stick with it. But how can I turn this into a daily ritual? So for example, if you're writing a book on gratitude, you know, you would take it and turn it into a daily ritual. They could do the around, you know, writing three things are grateful for them, giving just some examples. But it could be, um, let's say you're writing a book on business, right? Have a daily, a simple daily practice where they, you know, they, your book has them set their business goals. And then every day they're simply reviewing it. Maybe they're sharing it with their team, something that they're doing that gives them clarity and adds value to their life and is related to the content. Um, so that's the first thing is, is the behavior change. And the second thing is you've got to, you've got to Set them up for success.

AI assessment note: “how can I take this and put it into a daily ritual?”

Q estate agents, the miracle morning for so on and so forth. Salespeople, et cetera, are each of these kinds of targets. These are people that, you know, if you do it for salespeople, you can increase your speaking fees and you're speaking to sales organizations. Same thing for writers, entrepreneurs, parents, and families, et cetera. Got the strategy there. And if, if, if it's not, what is not at all?

A Um, and I didn't even really think about that, which maybe, maybe that's true, but the, what it is, is it's organically a friend of mine said, Hey, how we miracle morning for salespeople. Like, have you thought about doing a book series? He said, every salesperson needs this, but I've thought of some tweaks that could really make it custom for a salesperson. I said, dude, let's coauthor it. You know, this is my buddy, Ryan snow. And so we go out there and it just kind of, and then people came out of the woodworks going, Hey, let's do one for parents and families because It's, you know, how to get your kids and your spouse, the whole family to do the miracle morning. That book came out last month and then miracle morning for entrepreneurs comes out next month. So yeah, no, it's, it's a way to reach Tamron Harold. They were coauthored that miracle morning for entrepreneurs. And this is really a way, in fact, that'll be out probably right when this episode comes out, but it's just to reach into new audiences and markets and, and, uh, leveraging the platform of the coauthor and the expertise of the coauthor.

AI assessment note: “I didn't even really think about that... it's just to reach into new audiences”

Q And what's funny is I'm setting you up to tell the story here, right? So tell us, tell us about why there was no advance.

A Yeah. So, so I really debated whether or not I, like originally I was going to go after a traditional publisher because I thought this book could change the world. The miracle morning wasn't a book idea. It wasn't a book title. It was a practice that I created in my own life when I was 2008 low point, you know, economic crash. I was part of that whole thing. And, um, like so many of us were, but that Led to me creating this morning ritual that changed my life so quickly. It felt like a miracle. So I called it the mirror, my miracle morning, but again, it wasn't a book idea. And then organically it evolved. I taught some, it taught us some people and then they got the same results. And I thought, God, I have a responsibility to share this with the world. And three years later, I finally got my butt in gear and made it into a book. Um, then I debated, should I traditionally publish? Cause I really think that this could change the world if we get it to enough people. And, and so I thought, well, gosh, that's the way you do it, right? You go traditional. Uh, and as I explored self publishing over a six month period of searching for traditional publishers and agents, while I explored the pros and cons of both, you know, both avenues, um, I came to the conclusion that self publishing for 99, you know, point something percent of authors, uh, is the way to go. And, um, and it is funny …

AI assessment note: “I came to the conclusion that self publishing... is the way to go”