The Exchanges

Q May third. Okay, so tell us about the book. Give it to us in a nutshell. Why should people pick this up and read it?

A Okay, here's why they must pick it up and read it. Because whenever we talk about leadership or business or any other performance, the conversation is always about you're getting better, increasing your skills, increasing your competencies, increasing your abilities, all of that stuff, which is true. But here is the reality. People only get past their current limit of performance in the context of relationships that build that new ability. So, what that means is, it's not a question of whether or not people have power in your life and in your performance of the business. They do. The question is, what kind of power are they gonna have? And the book basically talks about, you know, if you look at any leader, any high performer, take their worst season and their best season, and there's another person or persons on the other end of that, and it talks about the dynamics of the inside relationships, the way they got to work for you to get to your highest performance, whether you're a Navy SEAL, Olympic athlete, or a CEO.

AI assessment note: “People only get past their current limit of performance in the context of relationships”

Q Why do you laugh when I ask that?

A Well, because, um, Here's why I laugh. You know, I, publishers, um, and if people are gonna, if they're gonna publish a book, then basically you've got to understand this. Everybody hates their publisher that I talk to. They do. You just talk to them. And the reason is that they don't understand what a publisher does because they think, gosh, if I write a book, a publisher is going to sell the book, right? That's what they do. They're going to market it. And you always hear this. The publisher's marketing and marketing, marketing. Basically, here's the reality. You, as the author, you're the one that sells your book. It's your platform that sells the book. I mean, take any, any, you know, New York Times bestseller, and tell me who the publisher is. Nobody, you know, they know the person, they know the book from the platform that the person builds and has. So, what you want to look for in a publisher is somebody that can help you distribute it well, And get it where it needs to be, and can be a thought partner in crafting it so it's usable, etc. But you're going to sell the book, and if you don't realize that, you're going to be frustrated with the publisher, and your book's going to, you know, sit in a few boxes in your office.

AI assessment note: “Here's why I laugh. You know, I, publishers... Everybody hates their publisher”

Q So Dr. Henry, when you, when you first start, when you first started, let's go back to your first book. Okay. So make this more valuable. You did it without an agent. How did you sell your first copies? Did you, cause obviously you have to build credibility. Then you can negotiate in advance on your next book, et cetera. Did you have an email list back then or what?

A Well, um, what I did at that time, I, I had started a, um, psychiatric hospital and treatment center company, and I had hospitals and treatment centers, um, all over the western states in about 40 markets, and I ran that company for a long time, and part of the marketing out, um, sort of outreach of that company in San Francisco, and Los Angeles, and Palm Springs, and Seattle, and Portland, and all the cities, Is I would go on the road and do big, um, You know, city-wide, you know, almost arena-sized events, and I would speak. And so at those events, we would take, you know, full resource tables and book rooms and all of that, and when you see markets with lots and lots of books, what happens is, then the word of mouth kind of catches on, and you're building it that way. At that time, when I wrote my first book, you know, email lists were not a big thing.

AI assessment note: “we would take, you know, full resource tables and book rooms”

Q Changes that heal. Okay. And, and so again, this was your first book, which is maybe again, more of a valuable lesson, uh, to, uh, to the audience. That book, how many copies did you sell?

A Uh, that book has sold, it's going towards two million copies or so by now, and I, and this is a great example. Never had written a book, and I got a, this is a 92, first time author, I, I think I got like a 10,000 dollar advance, which, For a first time author and, you know, never written anything, the publishers are telling me, you know, gosh, nobody gets this and all that, but I was doing my own deal. And I'm telling you, that's the last one I did without an agent, because then you learn really what, what, what your platform really is worth. And it's like any other business, you know, somebody's going to start out with With kind of what the author thinks the eyeballs are worth if they have listening to them. That's the math. That's the economics. And what you do is you make that first one work, and you make it go. You know, John Grisham sold his first book, A Time to Kill, for 5000 dollars.

AI assessment note: “that book has sold, it's going towards two million copies or so by now”

Q So, you have to tell me something. You know, people say, Nathan, don't write a book. It's a, like, takes a ton of time, and you don't make money off it, and it's a lot of work, and it's not worth it. You've written over 45 books and sold over eleven million copies. Why do you write so much?

A Well, it's interesting. You know, I'm, I'm not a writer. Right? So, um, I've got a day job, but what, two, probably two, two reasons. One is, um, the book Whatever book we're talking about, the books come from the work for me. I don't sit down and say, gosh, I'm going to write a book. What topic should I write on? What happens with me is I work with high performers. I work with mostly CEOs, their executive teams, and helping build their cultures, and what happens is I begin to see an issue in really high performers, you know, that continues to present itself, and so So the work is kind of like writing this book and it's screaming about, you know, if I find myself saying the same thing to, to, you know, multiple fortune, 25 types, then this is important. And so what, what I do is at some point, um, I said, I don't type that out. So, so for me, writing a book is about the work. And, and I think Nathan, that probably so many people that listen to you, um, Have written a book. They just haven't typed it because their story, what they've lived, what they've learned, that's a book. And the difficulty I see people having is getting it from their head and heart down, down to the page. And that just becomes a, you know, performance issue.

AI assessment note: “the books come from the work for me. I don't sit down and say”

Q Well, Dr. Henry, I let this interview cheat over just because it, again, it was kind of fascinating to learn and we had to kind of work around there to understand some of the numbers, but the power of the other, again, is, is coming out. If people want to connect to you personally online and really track the book and your message, where can they connect with you?

A Well, to find out about the book, and also a simulcast that you can take to your teams, or your companies, or just watch it online yourself, um, I, I did it live from, from Manhattan last week, and go to poweroftheother.com, and you can get that with the book, or, you know, any of the major retailers have it now, so in, so Amazon, or Barnes & Noble, any of those, it's Power of the Other, and I would just, you know, after You know, full of decades of working with these high performers from, you know, business to, to sports and all of it. I'm telling you that the idea of a self-made high performer is a total myth. You look at a Michael Phelps, you've got his coach that's been there since he was 13 or 14 years old. You look at all of these And they were mentored and built in by, built into by somebody very significant. The book talks about the dynamics of those relationships that are going to take you to your next level and how they're not optional. You've got to have them.

AI assessment note: “go to poweroftheother.com, and you can get that with the book”

Q consulting and they're trying to go, oh, maybe should I write my own book or not? Is it worth my time or should I just keep doing consulting work? So understanding these economics to the extent that you can share Is very, very helpful to them. So what do you have a typical royalty split with Harper Collins? I mean, is it a 20% or how does all that work?

A Let me speak to the person that you want to speak to there, because if somebody's never written a book, you know, because I was there too, right? And if you've never written a book and you're trying to compare it to, you know, gosh, is this worth it? You know, for people that have been doing this for, you know, over 20 years, you've got to, what you've got to ask yourself is this, why am I writing this book? Ok, it all goes back to, what is this book supposed to do for me? It's no different than any other way you run any other aspect of your business. And so, what I would want an entrepreneur to, to, to ask themselves is, what am I trying to do with this, ok? First of all, if they're in consulting or they're in some sort of whatever it is, then one of the things a book can do for you is it is a way of getting your message out. And so if you write a book and you go speak somewhere and do a consulting job, you know, if you're consulting with a company that has, you know, 50,000 employees, and you have a book. Now, A, you've extended your product line, but also you've got something that you can turn into helping them through training, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. So it's marketing. It's an extension of your product line. It's also kind of a calling card. It's also another way to get you in front of, you know, if you're just beginning in front of the audiences that you can't ge…

AI assessment note: “Let me speak to the person that you want to speak to there”

Q So what, what can you share? I mean, is there any, can you share royalty income, like royalty percentage or income or volume sold of that particular book?

A Well, I think it's like when you do any other deal. Okay. When you come to the table and if you, you know, if you're Donald Trump and you've built a bunch of high rises and you're taking on a partner because the publisher is a partner, you're going to get more of it than somebody who needs to build their first building. Right. So, so what you're going to see is you're basically on the economics of it. You're going to see beginning authors, you know, being offered Something in that, you know, I don't know, and I'd have to go back and look at all this from years ago, but, but it's going to be either a gross deal or a net deal. And when you When you're in those ranges, you're probably going to be seeing in beginning authors something in that 10 to 15% or so of gross, or if you get to net, you know, it can be different than that, and then the other thing that authors, if they're really doing out there doing work, the other thing you want to do is you really want to negotiate your ability to buy the book from the publisher at an insanely low cost, almost Almost a cost, and what you've got to convince them of, because publishers don't like to do that a lot of times, but, but you got to convince them, look, I'm your best marketing piece, and if you can give these books to me, you know, at somewhere near cost, and I go out, I speak to, you know, a thousand people, and I can have a book…

AI assessment note: “beginning authors something in that 10 to 15% or so of gross”

Q And you've done this like a series. You've done this for marriage, kids, everything, right?

A Um, so, so the boundaries books have, you know, they're, they're in the numbers. Um, That little handful has sold about five or six million copies, and it is currently, um, I think this month, and the original book is, you know, 20 years old, and it's number nine on the New York Times list this month, so it, it, it caught a nerve, and so what, what I began to see is even in high performers, the subtitle of that, that book is about results and relationships, and what happens is even the highest performers tend to Lose control. In other words, the mission starts to drive them sideways. They're, they've got a direct report that's making them crazy. They got a board member, they got an investor, and the, one of the biggest problems that high performance have, high performers have, is to stay On focus. And, and, and the way the brain works, if you're gonna, if, you know, you gotta remember, if everything's important, nothing is. And what we see high performers struggling with is, high performers struggling with is that they lose their boundaries. Everybody intrudes upon them. Everybody intrudes. They're trying to change the strategy. Their next move is very important topic. So for some reason, it struck a nerve, and That's what happened.

AI assessment note: “so the boundaries books have, you know, they're, they're in the numbers.”

Q uh, born for this. I believe that was the name of the book. Um, help us understand with Harper Collins, did you, they, have they been working with you through this whole series for boundaries for leaders? And if so, did they, again, did you pitch them or did they pitch you? And if they pitched you and really wanted you, what was the advance that you worked together under?

A Well, you're, you're talking about a long path here, right? So, so I wrote a book, um, in, uh, this would have been the early nineties and it was called changes that heal. And it was, uh, actually a book about high performance, um, and life and getting well and all that, and, and how it relates to both psychology and, and spirituality. And so what happened was the second section of that book, um, My first book was called Boundaries, and all the questions I got were about boundaries, et cetera, et cetera, and so I decided that, you know, we need to write a book on boundaries, so, so when that happened, and that one just, you know, kind of went crazy, when you, when you're writing your first book, you know, you, you gotta find somebody to publish it, right, unless you self-publish, And I wrote my first book without an agent, which, which most people think they should do because they go, why should I give an agent, you know, 15% of this thing or whatever. I've written 40 something books. And, you know, you said your audience is into numbers. We're talking about twelve million copies. That's a lot of books. New York Times bestsellers. And I'm telling you, in forty-something books, the only book I ever wrote without an agent was my first one. Now, there's a reason for that. I didn't know what I was doing. And you talk to 99% of people that really do well in publishing They will tell…

AI assessment note: “Well, you're, you're talking about a long path here, right?”

Q What do you mean? Like if you hit X amount of sales, you get a higher royalty?

A Yeah, now I know this. I didn't know this then, but you go to this and, you know, if you earn it back within, you know, the whole twink of a nine, then you get another bonus, and you can do, you know, look, it's a partnership. The publisher wants to make money, you want to do well, and ultimately, the economics, if you know what you're doing, the economics are like any other deal. It's gonna fall Where are the waterfalls? I mean, water is going to sink the market. So a lot of people make a mistake. They, they fall in love with their idea and they think this is so wonderful. Everybody else tells me how to write this. Well, that's great. We know you love it, but publishers don't pay for love. Publishers pay for platforms and the ability to move books.

AI assessment note: “Yeah, now I know this... if you earn it back... then you get another bonus”