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Berger: Regularly making requests prevents self-deception and frustration

Kenneth Berger · Why not asking for what you want is holding you back | Kenneth Berger (exec coach, first PM @Slack) · May 19, 2024 · at 5:49

Kenneth Berger, an executive coach and the first product manager at Slack, explains how directly advocating for one's desires impacts personal integrity and career fulfillment.

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“And I think to me, the flip side of that is, is sort of the reason that the stakes around asking for what you want are so high because yeah, you know, if you're, we can't guarantee we're going to get what we want, but if we're asking for it regularly, if we're listening to the response, we're respecting the no's we get from the world, then we can kind of get the sense of, yeah, I'm honoring what's important to me. I'm honoring the world's response and I'm moving forward towards what I want. And if we don't do that, well, then we're kind of fooling ourselves that we're actually moving towards what we want. And there tends to be all these sort of unexpected secondary and tertiary effects that come out of that, right? Of stress and frustration and unhappiness, because of course, asking for what we want, pursuing what's important to us in life is just one of the most important things of fulfillment, right?”

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